As parents, we have a great influence on how our children grow up. Children will learn through experience, and for parents, this is a very large responsibility. A divorce brings up a whole set of experiences you may want to consider and be aware of.
Stressed out parents may be distracted from what they are teaching their children during the divorce process. Overlooking these important considerations may create a scenario where family values are overlooked for a short time period. What is lightly concerning, is that your children are learning more about the world than normal due to all of the emotions surrounding a divorce. As the process of separating or divorcing escalates, the lessons being taught should be on the forefront. A few behaviors to consider during this time are – if you want your children to:
- Blame others instead of taking responsibility for their own actions?
- Learn how to talk badly about other people?
- Develop tolerance towards others?
- Be critical and judgmental instead of forgiving?
- Hold onto feelings of bitterness?
- Play the victim or learn to let go?
- Spend time complaining versus living in gratitude?
- React destructively instead of learning impulse control?
- Learn how to distort reality to get their way instead of being honest?
- Be vengeful?
- Act immaturely or take the “high road”?
- Become a bully or someone who knows how to compromise?
- Be selfish or thoughtful?
- Learn how to pick their battles?
- Learn conflict resolution skills?
One thing to consider is to ask yourself what you want your children to learn from the divorce. This traumatic process is a great opportunity to teach through example. Your children are watching you and will feel the emotions you feel. To read more about creating teachable moments from the divorce process, click here.
Click here to contact Lambert Law Office, Crystal is a dedicated Vancouver WA divorce attorney that can help your family through this time.